So I was on the plane, headed toward Milwaukee from San Francisco. I had my knitting. I was finished. I could now tear out the crochet stitching for the provisional cast on, and start my kitchener stitch.
Where’s my pattern? Dig, dig dig. Oh no. My pattern’s not here. Well, I can just go back on to Ravelry and find out how to do the kitchener. Yes, yes, I have done the kitchener a thousand times before. But, is it knit off, purl on on the front row? That’s what my brilliant friend Christal told me. But, it could be purl off, knit on. Shoot. I can’t remember. I had worked so hard thus far. Did it make any sense to take a chance and do it wrong? No way.
It cost $8 on the plane to get on to the internet. Hmmm. Is it worth it? Well, just this once.
So, I try and get on the internet on my phone. It doesn’t work. I have tried a million times and it won’t connect. All I can do is hope that my payment didn’t go through. So, I put my knitting in the bag and say I will just have to wait until I get home.
So, I down 2 gin and tonics. Bored. So bored. I need my knitting. Hell, it’s a 3 and a half hour flight to Milwaukee. I don’t want to sit here and not knit. Who can I call that knows the kitchener? Oh, that’s right, I’m on the airplane. Bored. So bored. All this time and I could be finishing a project.
I look over and my husband is asleep. He had heard me pestering the flight attendants to help me get on the internet. They weren’t interested. They gave me a few pat phrases like “Gee, other people are on”, and “I know that the Captain reset the internet so it should work”. They are not interested in fixing my internet woes.
Now the woman in front of me is telling the person coming down the aisle that even though she’s sitting, she is next in the bathroom. My bladder is full. It’s a good thing that I have a nurse’s bladder. A nurse’s bladder can hold 1000 cc of urine over the course of 8 hours.
I see that my husband is still asleep. I take my computer out of my bag. Maybe if I can’t get on the internet on the phone, my computer will work. Slowly, deftly, I take my computer out of the bag. I open it. I sign in. I put in my name, email and address. Then I put the credit card number in. I hope that I am not charged $16 just to find out how to do the kitchener’s stitch.
Voile’! Victory is mine! I’m on the internet. So I find a page that tells me how to do the kitchener’s stitch. Gee, it’s hard to do this on a plane. I have 100 stitches to do this on and it requires a long piece of yarn. I carefully pull the yarn through, even though the sequins continually get caught. I’m doing it. It is knit off, purl on for the front needle and purl off, knit on for the back. Oh, if only I could remember this for next time.
I really have to go to the bathroom now. So I move my knitting off to the side. Luckily the flight is not full so there is a seat open between me and hubby. I get up to move to the back for the bathroom. Hey, there’s a woman behind me knitting too! I tell her briefly of my woes to get on to the internet for the kitchener’s stitch. She says “Oh, I would have helped you…knit off, purl on for the front needle and purl off, knit on for the back”. I couldn’t have made this up if I had tried. I handed her my business card and said “If you’re ever in Ripon….I know of a great yarn shop!”
